OK, folks, I give you fair warning up front. This one ain't gonna come out smelling like roses.
I keep wondering who is getting rich off of the current gas prices. I am thinking that the majority of us are going broke just trying to keep a half a tank. And since hurricane season is right around the corner, it is pretty much an extremely good idea to make that a habit in case of last minute evacuations. And that makes for this coming summer to be very, very, expensive.
As we look for alternatives to gas guzzling cars, we are all beginning to realize that those so-called solutions are priced way out of reach for most people, and impossible to attain on a retired salary. I think I have a solution, but I am totally unable to figure out how to make it work.
You see, those cows are on to something. They eat an awful lot of green leafy things. And they produce an awful lot of gas. So we need to figure out how to harness all that gas and put it into our gas tanks. And since we should not depend on just one solution/aspect of alternative fuels, I think this is where I can help. After all, I am a full fledged member of the 4-F club!
I eat green leafy things. I get gas. Why can't we figure out how to put it to good use? It is already useful as bathroom humor. Let's get creative and devise a plan to convert it into a usable fuel source. Think about it. It is plentiful. It is certainly a renewable resource, and it costs very little to produce. I should know, I now consider myself a walking fuel rod for gas.
I do not know why it has gotten so bad, but it is a good thing that I am alone most of the time in the house. And that I have lots of windows...
It happens so frequently the last few weeks that I make sure that when I drop something in a class in which I am substituting, I plead old age as to the reason why they have to help and pick it up for me. Because, if I bend over, the conversation in the younger classes will be something along this line:
"Toooot."
"Miss! Miss! You just farted!" Lots of giggling.
"No, it wasn't me, Susie. Jimmy was it you?"
Whereupon, several students simultaneously yell, "No, Miss, it was YOU!" Hilarious laughing.
Being a dignified person, I straighten my shoulders and explain that flatulence is a natural process, yadda, yadda, and that you ALL do it, and many of you do it all night long, yadda, yadda, and it happens because, yadda, yadda, yadda. You get the idea. Circle the wagons and divert the attention by using big words that they don't understand, then remind them that it is math time and please get out your pencils.
In high school, you just get a "wasn't me" comment as work just continues. But it is an invitation to a slow death by embarrassment if you toot in a middle school classroom. Because they will ALWAYS comment on the smell and what you possibly ate to give that particular odour du jour.
I am at that stage in my financial life, that if I am going to do it, I had better enjoy it or make money off it. So come on, people, let's get with the program, here! We are Americans! We can solve this problem and find a way to make it profitable.
I am 4-F and my gas is free. Come and get it!
2 comments:
Ok I may have some help.after reviewing and listening to the problem in hand, Perhaps someone should look at a Recycle Program. This could be a relative simple plan to do and cost effective.Just recycle till it is time to sell the product or just use or even back up a second and give it to best friend. This will be a low end fix using some gorilla glue and about 4 ft of good rubber hose or for cattle , about 8 ft of hose.After installation, just release and start the recycle process.After recycling several times , this gas should be much more dangerous and that's when one can market the most volumne processed(MVP) to sell.You now have become a MVP in this deal!The process should be ok with all OSHA rules and along with the EPA on vapor emmissions release Program, we know as ERP, and then we also have to watch closely the "Moisture Content" which switches us to the TCEQ (Texas water wardens) side of the state goverment.Moisture content is very important in this process so that the gas flows freely and doesn't contain any thing that will block the releases.I am not an expert , however I think this can be done by diet.If we don't have the correct releases, the Washington and Austin Groups may interfear and make us drink Ethanol E-85 to reduce emmissions, (like a jigger in your tea or coke at night or pour 1 gal into water tank) Now I recognize that those folks know alot about fumes and that they are the masters of producing this amount of vapor every day, but we need to keep them out of our back door business.I believe we should call this process "GRIP". This stands for the "Gas Recovery INDEEP Program".So let's all get a "GRIP" and move forward!When GRIP is formed and the process is flowing, one only needs to decide when to sell , share or pehaps give an early release program a good start.Your thoughts??
I had to wait to finish LMAO. You may be on to something there.... Not many of my friends are that technical, but I have a few in mind who would willingly come to my time in need, aka hour of power. And you are so very correct about watching that moisture content. Very Important in Pooting!
Post a Comment