What Gives You Comfort?

If you have been a regular reader of my blog, you probably remember that my Uncle Lester passed away a couple of months ago. I was deeply saddened when I found out last week that his wife, my Aunt Flossie, suddenly died. I suppose she was ready to go be with her husband and her brothers and sisters.

Aunt Flossie was known for her total devotion to her own family. Her kids, her grand kids, and now her great-grand kids were the center of her universe, and she lovingly made their world a better place for having been a part of it. I will miss her terribly.

Aunt Flossie was also known for two other things: her quilts and her German Chocolate Cake. Let me talk about the cake first. She made it from scratch. She used her own eggs, along with fresh butter and cream. It was an absolute given that in our family, her cake was the groom's cake. And she made a lot of them. And we were all disappointed when we went to a wedding and the cake wasn't sitting there on the table. That cake gave us comfort, and there was never a crumb left to freeze for the first anniversary.

Aunt Flossie also made quilts for the family. She would present them as wedding and baby gifts. I would always ask her when I would get mine, and she would always answer without hesitation "when you get married." And since I hadn't married, it had become a running joke between the two of us.

When Mom was so sick, she made her one. That quilt gave my mother great comfort. It was made by her sister, with loving hands, and became a symbol of their devotion to each other. It was that same quilt that gave me my only laugh when my mother died. After a few days had passed, I called to check on her, and I all but nanny-nanny-boo-booed her with the knowledge that I got my quilt after all! There isn't a time that I don't pull out that quilt and think of both of them. Now, it gives ME comfort.

My mistake when Mom was so sick was that I used food as my comforter. It didn't give me any, but it did leave its fat calories behind. And if I have learned anything about my eating habits on this journey it is the fact that I, for way too many years, was a stress eater. I finally figured it out this year, when several people that I knew and loved passed on. I didn't reach for the water, I reached for the cookies and the chips. No apples for me unless they were in a great big pie.

I also figured out that I must have been stressed for many years prior to my "aha" moment. And, now that I think back on it, I realize how complicated and stressful I made my life. Losses, moving to different towns, and breaking up with my long time boyfriend all helped add to my stress. I went into a career that often, especially in the beginning, gave me joy and comfort, but that over the years became increasingly stressful. Which led to more bad food choices until I slowly began to ruin my health.

It is so easy to see now. Why couldn't I see it then? One reason: because we only see what we want to see!

Food should be used to give your body nourishment. It is not meant, and has never been meant to be, your source of comfort. We all have our comfort foods. I am now visibly looking to what I turn to when I need comfort. And I am working hard to make work, exercise, and healthy food choices that which brings me comfort.

I was going to write a little more, but we are about to get our FIRST thunderstorm of the year and hopefully bring us some much-needed rain!

Come on down, Rain. Bring this land some comfort. I am thinking that taking a nap while it rains sounds quite comforting to me!